Standards

Author's Note: Written last May 3. Seriously, you have better luck being updated with my writing on my deviantart. *points to link in sidebar*
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It always hurt,how you could never
seem to get over that laziness.
Or make your short-lived resolve
last longer.
Even for me.

But I guess
it's something
that I didn't want
to demand you to change.

And I can't say I'm fine
whenever you failed again
to keep another promise.
And when your insufferability
becomes too much to handle,
sometimes I wish
you'd be a lot less [you]

I've always had my standards.
And I admit you never
really [met] them.

Because if someone
had told me
you'd be the one back then.

I'd have laughed.

But you proved me wrong
with your eyes [burning]
with borderline madness.
And it drew me in
with your jigsaw puzzle
of pride and insecurity,
of logic and emotion.

Because you were always more
than just my standards, love.
You picked them up
and threw them at my face.
Looked back with your
defiant stubborness
and kissed away
the doubt.

Because it's [you]
I chose, love.
Not the mirrored ideas
of whatever I might have wanted
[you] to be.
It's [you] and not
whatever the standards
told you what you should have been.

And whenever I thought to myself
I couldn't handle it,
I always told myself,
I wouldn't want [you] to change.

Because even when
I tried to find
a million different reasons
to hate you
to leave you
and to be ashamed of you.
There'd always be
a [bajillion] more reasons
not to.

[Always.]